Main Page

search for:
4457 jokes archived

Next Joke Previous Joke


Bar Jokes
Blonde Jokes
Little Johnny
Nerd Jokes
Political Jokes
Religious Jokes
Sex Jokes
Top 10 Lists

All Jokes


1. On a blanket from Taiwan - NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO. 2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists - REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU. 3. On a Taiwanese shampoo - USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE. 4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink - AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT. 5. On a New Zealand insect spray - THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS. 6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer - TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.) 7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemorrhoids - LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5 MINUTES, KEEP QUIET. 8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles - OPEN OTHER END. 9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins - WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL? 10. On a Sears hairdryer - DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING. 11. On a bag of Fritos - YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE. 12. On a bar of Dial soap - DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP. 13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) - DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN. 14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding - PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING. 15. On a Korean kitchen knife - WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN. 16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights - FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY. 17. On a Japanese food processor - NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE. 18. On Sainsbury's peanuts - WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS. 19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts - INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS. 20. On a Swedish chainsaw - DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS. 21. On a child's superman costume - WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY. 22. On some frozen dinners - SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST. 23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box - FITS ONE HEAD. 24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron - DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY. 25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine - DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY. 26. On Nytol sleep aid - WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

Previous Joke Next Joke

© 2000-2006 Peter R. Sadlon
a merentha entertainment project