Main Page


search for:
4457 jokes archived
Other

Next Joke Previous Joke


Categories

Bar Jokes
Blonde Jokes
Little Johnny
Nerd Jokes
Political Jokes
Religious Jokes
Sex Jokes
Top 10 Lists
Other

All Jokes

Lables

1. On a blanket from Taiwan - NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO. 2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists - REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU. 3. On a Taiwanese shampoo - USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE. 4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink - AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT. 5. On a New Zealand insect spray - THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS. 6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer - TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.) 7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemorrhoids - LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5 MINUTES, KEEP QUIET. 8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles - OPEN OTHER END. 9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins - WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL? 10. On a Sears hairdryer - DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING. 11. On a bag of Fritos - YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE. 12. On a bar of Dial soap - DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP. 13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) - DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN. 14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding - PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING. 15. On a Korean kitchen knife - WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN. 16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights - FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY. 17. On a Japanese food processor - NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE. 18. On Sainsbury's peanuts - WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS. 19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts - INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS. 20. On a Swedish chainsaw - DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS. 21. On a child's superman costume - WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY. 22. On some frozen dinners - SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST. 23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box - FITS ONE HEAD. 24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron - DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY. 25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine - DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY. 26. On Nytol sleep aid - WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

Previous Joke Next Joke

© 2000-2006 Peter R. Sadlon
a merentha entertainment project