A man on his way home from work at the Pentagon came to a dead halt and thought to himself, "Wow, this traffic seems worse tha usual. Nothing is moving." He notices a police officer walking back and forth between the lines of cars so he rolls down his window and asks. "Excuse me officer, what's the holdup?"
The officer replies, "The President just found out he was impeached and he's all depressed. He stopped his motorcade in the middle of the Beltway and he's threatening to douse himself with gasoline and set himself on fire. He says his family hates him and he doesn't have the $33.5 million he owes his lawyers. I'm walking around taking up a collection for him."
"Oh really? How much have you collected so far?"
"Well, right now I have about three hundred gallons but there are still a lot of folks siphoning."